We don’t choose our desires, but our desires choose us.

Photo by Dương Trần Quốc on Unsplash

We cannot choose to desire something else than we desire. It’s possible that we don’t like our desires for various reasons. Maybe the desire doesn’t make sense and we judge it as stupid, maybe we think it’s too big and unattainable for us, or maybe we consider the desire to be amoral and we are ashamed to have it.

When we judge and shame our desires or something else about us, we push it into the unconscious, where it continues to exist of course. The lost self as a disowned part of our personality would be an example. …


You are whole and worthy of love already.

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The personal development industry often centers around trying to fix people as if they were broken and needed repair.

It implies that there is a right way to think and act and that we are all doing it wrongly.
It implies that life has a goal and we need to work hard to get a glimpse at it, let alone reach it.

I disagree with this fixing mentality.

There is not one right way to live, but YOUR way to live. The more you find your own expression, the more fulfilled you will feel. …


The secret lies in accepting and loving ALL there is in your life.

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Inspired by Carolyn Elliotts work around shadow integration that she calls “Existential Kink” I deepened my embodied experience of the importance of feeling everything.

Every emotion, every experience, every thought and emotion invites us to feel more deeply and be more present with what is.

They also provide a chance for our ego to jump at them and judge them as good, bad, (in)acceptable, (a)moral etc. The judgment is completely made up and in our perception of reality.

It is our choice to buy into the judgement’s…


And what it takes to do that.

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I’ll be blunt with you for a moment: As long as you don’t take responsibility for your life, you will fail to consistently create a fulfilled life that feels like home to you.

Taking responsibility means that you recognize your creative part in your experiences.
Whether you acknowledge your always present power and influence on your own life or not, you always have this power and influence.

Only because you rather don’t want to look at the drama with your colleague at work, your back pain or your lack of money, those circumstances…


What to do instead for authentic creative expression

First, I don’t think you can run out of creativity, but you lose sight of it and your connection to it.

Creativity is everywhere.
Creative expression is always present, even when you don’t see it.

I’m not an expert on creativity, but I have a couple of things to say about expression. Not just random disembodied expression, but expression that comes from your core, your wisdom, your pussy.

This is the kind of creativity you feel coming through you without thinking. It creates effortlessly and leaves you grounded, centered and fuller.

It is raw and honest and deeply personal. It…


And an offer for an effective antidote.

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The criticism you have against yourself, no matter if it’s against your body, your thoughts, your emotions, your actions or anything else is an attack against yourself. You can call it friendly fire.

You aren’t a better person with higher morals when you are overly critical of yourself.

Criticism brings your attention to everything you don’t like. You want yourself to be different than you are at the moment.

What does this do with you? Do you feel energized and enthusiastic about going out there and making the best out of your time…


Pleasure is available all the time if you know what to look for.

The author by Bernhard Kössler

Today is a wonderful day for taking a run — cool, cloudy and dry. So I jogged on the Danube island in Vienna. A bit cool in the beginning, but after half an hour my body was warmed up.

That’s when I saw the dark blue water and I felt the urge to swim.

I wanted to feel immersed in the water and feel it streaming over my bare skin.

I stopped, checked the water temperature and hesitated. No surprise there 🙂

Instead of turning away, I…


What to do instead

Author by Andreas Pietsch

Mantras or affirmations seem to be the straightest and easiest way to your dreams. You just tell yourself 24/7 that you are rich, beautiful and happy and tadaa! all your dreams come true in no time.

Or so they say.

If this doesn’t work, you should also write it on post-its everywhere you look during the day and if you’re still poor and unhappy and don’t like your body, you just need to try harder!

You better not think a single negative thought (whatever that is) ever or doubt that it’s working.

Still no results? You’re clearly doing wrong and…


Everyone has a unique quality of magic.

My magic is my joyful and deep presence. For my clients I hold a warm and safe space that allows them to become quiet and honest with themselves. They experience how vulnerability opens the door to a deeper truth within them. From there they can make aligned choices and find their authentic expression.

So often I have heard from women that with me they dare to speak out the unspeakable and feel held, seen and relieved when they notice that I don’t judge them. How could I judge them for being human? …


If you want to have something, don’t wait to be given miraculously.

Photo by Kelly Sikkema on Unsplash

Have you been told that you will be given what you give others? Literally.
So if you please others and give them everything they want, you will receive everything you desire.

It sounds so nice to the ears of warm, heart-centered, giving women like us, right?
We really want this to be true.
We do what we are trained to do: give, please others, maybe even over-give. But hey, can you over-give when you receive what you give?

There is just one problem with this “law”: it’s not true as such.

There are people who don’t give a f**k about…

Maria Hubmann

Women’s sex + pleasure coach, scientist, introverted empath. “You have the freedom to choose yourself, trust yourself, and love yourself now.” mariahubmann.com

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